Ménage à trois is the French term describing a relationship or domestic arrangement in which three people, often a married couple and another lover, share a sexual relationship, although the relationship might or might not involve all three persons having sexual relations with each other.[1] The French phrase literally translates as "household of three". An example would be Emma Hamilton, her husband, and Horatio Nelson.
It is also used to refer to an arrangement where three people share sexual relations, and this has become the predominant definition. Some also use it to describe any sex act involving three people, otherwise known as a threesome.
The ménage à trois is a recurring theme in fiction and has been the subject of a number of books, plays, films and songs. Some notable examples which have this as a core theme include:
Paint Your Wagon (1969) — in the film version, Ben marries Elizabeth, but she falls in love with Partner. They decide that if a Mormon man can have two wives, then a wife can have two husbands.
Sunday Bloody Sunday (1971), directed by John Schlesinger, a movie about a threesome with a homosexual man, a heterosexual woman, and a bisexual man.
Cabaret (film) (1972), directed by Bob Fosse, a movie about a threesome with a heterosexual woman played by Liza Minnelli, and two men. The MC also sings a song entitled "Two Ladies."
Summer Lovers (1982), a film with Peter Gallagher and Daryl Hannah, in which a vacation in Greece leads to a female-male-female relationship that is both emotional and sexual.
Garden of Eden This novel by Ernest Hemingway, written between 1946 and 1961, and published in 1986, centers on an American expatriate couple who bring another woman into their marriage.
Threesome A 1994 feature film comedy depicts a love triangle of three college roommates, two men and a woman. The woman (Lara Flynn Boyle) loves/lusts after the gay man (Josh Charles), who loves/lusts after the straight man (Stephen Baldwin), who loves/lusts after the woman. The movie explores the complications of real friendship, jealousies and sexual relationships among students still discovering their own identities.
Kiss the Sky (1999). Aging married friends try to form a threesome while building an island retirement refuge. Though they fail, they learn to accept their situation with the help of a Buddhist monk.
Politics, a novel about a ménage à trois ("the socialist utopia of sex").
In "Bandits" (2001), ménage à trois is a major part of the plot.
The Dreamers - a film staring Eva Green shows a beautiful and functional ménage à trois with a very unfortunate end.
In the film Shortbus (2006) James and Jamie meet a young ex-model and aspiring singer named Ceth and the three begin a sexual relationship
The 2004 film "Head in the Clouds", starring Penelope Cruz, Charlize Theron and Stuart Townsend tells the story of these three characters' sexual and romantic relationship with each other.
TV show Seinfeld references the ménage à trois in multiple episodes, including "The Switch".
The sub-plot of the Frasier episode Proxy Prexy involves Roz mistaking Niles and Daphne's offer of Melange (fruit salad) for Ménage, leading to them teasing her when she does not refuse.
^ For example, Evans v. Commissioner, 908 F.2d 369, 370 (8th Cir. 1990) refers to the relationship between Carolyn Cassady, Neal Cassady, and Jack Kerouac as a "ménage à trois" even though there appears to be no real evidence that Neal Cassady and Kerouac had sexual contact with each other.
Further reading
Barbara Foster, Michael Foster, Letha Hadady. Three in Love: Ménages à trois from Ancient to Modern Times. ISBN 0595008070
Vicki Vantoch. The Threesome Handbook: A Practical Guide to sleeping with three. ISBN 1568583338
